the gap

There are just somedays i am blown away at how the years have changed life. There are also days when i am blown away at how the years have changed me. Today was more of the latter. I just can't help but look at the person i am today and the person i want to be and see a massive gap.

I think today i am more humble and less holy than i have ever been.

I love it that i can stand at the feet of God and just soak it all in...i just can't do one good thing without God, i don't have it in me and i feel so much peace in that.

I hate it that my heart doesn't hesitate to tell me how i have missed the mark. I am always faced with my own hopelessness of doing anything good alone. I think what i am really talking about is being transformed into someone who might even vaguely resemble Jesus. That would be wonderful.