the desire

God's really been dealing with me on the line of desire lately. Somehow i have gotten off on the outright pursuit of my heart and forgotten God in the process. Its like i have been much more consumed with the satisfaction of my heart than the satisfaction in my God.

I think there is a lie out there in contemporary faith that says pursuit of our hearts = pursuit of God. It's as if the the epitome of good is found at the deepest depths of our hearts. And that is almost true, but the most powerful lies are found right at the edge of truth.

I have been way too self-conscious lately. Way too introverted. I taken way to much time to think about my lack and perpetuated the need. Pursuit of my heart has brought me to a place of heightened awareness of every pubescent insecurity i thought i left behind with the 9th grade.

I think there is a whole lot to be said about losing yourself in the pursuit of God.