I think I could use a little more abandon in my life. A little more letting go.
If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross and follow me. For whoever wants to save his life[a] will lose it, but whoever loses his life for me will find it. Mt. 16:24
I hold onto my own dreams, even though they are broken, incomplete visions of what God has in store. Perhaps I have envisioned the good and let go of the great. Maybe I have somehow settled for the best I can imagine, unwilling to step into the amazing willing of God. I need a little more reckless abandon in the pursuit of God.
I reject the ordinary but can’t quite catch hold of the extraordinary. Maybe it’s because I secretly believe extraordinary people live on a lonely plane. Somehow I have come to believe that the closer I step to God the more he will strip from me. I suppose what’s at the heart of this is that I believe I am better at fulfilling my own desires than God is.
Maybe I secretly believe that God has an extraordinary calling on my life, and suddenly I realize I still have a love for the ordinary. Extraordinary people have no fear of the unknown, and they do not clutch to the past.
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2 comments:
It is almost oddly unsettling how vividly you've captured the thoughts and feelings I have, yet I knew not how to put words to them. Man.
I'm kind of wishing we had a computer lab again :)
YOU are solid! And I keep saying it, but I absolutely want to do church with you soon. Sunday the 25th?
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